… equals my forty-two year everything’s now hurt but I’m proud to say I dusted those fools! So proud my Americano slang is picking up. I will continue to mix it and intertwine it with my UK speak to create the perfect Ameritish or Britican… I will then write to Rosetta Stone and demand they adopt it. Ohhhh weeee I’m drinkity-drink-drunk! Twenty plus years of training from has not been in vain. From being able to perfectly pour a glass of beer by age eight, to finessing the statue-still drunk pose in front of your Mum at 17, and culminating into not being Beverly ‘likes a Bevvie’ Marshall and gliding on her bum cheeks across the edge pool table on ‘Drink the Bar Dry’ night at Uni before crashing to the floor – bitch please. I must go to bed, although I am in bed, I can’t feel my bed. Crap my hands look like bear paws! I guess people sleep in their work suit right?
I might need to wee.
Melissa “BOSS” Hathaway